Tuesday, March 31, 2009

Chuck is American Beauty

Chuck Update - 3/15/09 - 11:35am
Chuck drank for 20 hours straight yesterday and is now heading to the library to study. god i love law school.

My Thoughts
Does this give anybody else the feeling that Chuck isn't living with his mom for the first time in his life and now he doesn't know what to do with himself? Earth to Chuck, (hellooo - hihh - hellooo), you don't have to be in law school to drink for 20 hours straight, you could have just moved out of your mom's house. And instead of going to the library the next day you could just be going to a job............nahhhhhhhhh, I'm just kidding buddy! What would I do without you? I couldn't be happier that you're in law school!

But really, you drank for 20 hours straight yesterday Chuck? Seriously? In more than one way, I don't think that you know the meaning of "straight." If you said that you drank for 20 hours yesterday I would have hard enough time believing you already, but it's impossible to believe that coming from a guy who says, "I hate jello shots because they're too sweet and strong!" So 20 hours straight and you're heading to the library at 11:35 am? Well I've been awake for 86 hours straight after running a marathon, flying around the world, and having an orgy..........so I'm sure you're capable of doing a lot REAL studying after yesterday.........just like any law student (in your mind), I know you are an "Unstoppable Alcoholic Information Machine!"

Chuck Update - 3/16/09 - 12:53am
Chuck ok this weekend was amazing but this week i HAVE to get serious about school. seriously i am not going out this weekend...

My Thoughts
Chuck, I think you need to consult your previous update. You ARE serious about school, you went to the library the morning after a 20 hour drinking day remember!?! Frankly, I'm amazed that you are still pretending that you need to study more. If you were really serious about it then you would just do it right? Oh wait that's right, I remember now, law school is all about telling people that you study all the time but not actually doing it............it's just like real life! "Yes sir, I thought long and hard about doing the project, I did a lot of self-reflection, but then I never actually did it.....so anyway, let's talk about that raise!"

You'll be trading mortgage derivatives before you know it Chuck! You really should have had me write this update for you Chuck, I really could have shortened it, it would have said, "Chuck is going out this weekend."

Chuck Update - 3/16/09 - 2:10pm
Chuck www.cnn.com

My Thoughts

Chuck Update - 3/16/09 - 3:42pm
Chuck the warm weather is killing my winter depression. i love sunshine

My Thoughts
If any one has their finger on the pulse of the people it's Chuck! This update is proof that Chuck's modus operandi transcends law school. Not only does Chuck say everything that people expect to hear about law school, he also says everything they expect to hear about weather. Regardless, I don't remember Chuck ever being in a winter depression? As far as I know he leads the happiest, most satisfying life that anyone has ever lived! I remember things like, "Chuck has the greatest friends ever", "Chuck loves law school and pudding", and "Chuck is living baby!"

So let's get this straight.......Chuck loves studying and drinking, he loves sports, he loves cooking, he loves wine, he loves sunshine, he loves Disney movies, he loves manly movies, and he loves, Chuck Update - 9/14/08 - 6:04pm Chuck loves rainy days. life is good.

WHOA! Chuck loves rain AND sunshine! I'm surprised but I know that I shouldn't be. As always Chuck, you really should have had me write this update for you, it would have said,
"Chuck loves whatever you love and hates whatever you hate and slightly dislikes whatever you slightly dislike, but he definitely loves sunshine and the smell of dryer sheets (cuz everyone does right!)"

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